Annoyed by your colleague?
Perhaps you had an open conflict or you are in a state of hidden (latent) conflict, or your colleague is just a nasty guy who makes strange decisions and interferes with your work, puts a spoke in your wheels, breaks the chain of command, yells at you or colleagues, is controlling, lazy, stupid, makes mistakes, etc.
Of course, a person can objectively screw up and not perform his tasks in the best way, but in order to look at things soberly and build constructive interaction, be it intersecting on work tasks, a conversation with feedback, or even dismissal, it is advisable to do this not through the prism of negativity and emotional stress, and, so to speak, “with a cool head.” And here it is important to start changes with yourself. More precisely, from your perception of the situation and the other person.
Yes, your colleague is unpleasant to you not because he is an unpleasant person, but because you perceive him that way. After all, we are all different, multifaceted and complex, and some of our traits and manifestations can strongly resonate with the people around us – positively or negatively.
I suggest you think about the following questions:
What exactly is the trait that irritates you? (It is very important to be able to identify and name specific actions/words/habits of another person that cause negativity in you. This will help you realize that not the entire person is bad.)
Why might he need these traits? (He may have some unpleasant manifestations to others, not because he is an unpleasant person in principle, but because at one time he could have developed certain adaptation mechanisms that helped him “survive” in our harsh world.)
Does the person have traits and sides that you might find interesting and like? (Of course, it’s difficult to try to see positive traits in a person we don’t like, to be merciful enough to notice that there is a lot more in him than what we don’t like. But still try to give him a chance…)
By being able to change your perception and constructively build communication, you will significantly grow as a specialist and improve your soft skills.
Have you tried to change your subjective perception of reality?
I'm really looking forward to your feedback in the comments!
