Retreat in the Arctic or how I lay on tiles for 4 days, didn't eat anything and almost ended up in a mental hospital

Hi, my name is Elena, I manage 30 women's clothing stores all over Russia. Once upon a time I was a loving wife, living a happy luxury life: holidays in Dubai, Michelin restaurants, Lamborghini and Rolls-Royce. But one day, as if with a snap of the fingers, “I was gone.” I hope my story will help many people to avoid depression or find a way out of it before it's too late.

Three reasons why I stopped feeling joy in life and was lying on the tiles in suspended animation

Reason #1: The race along the career track and the enormous burden of responsibility: the run from salesperson to CEO

No, I was not born with a silver spoon in my mouth, but achieved everything myself. I am the CEO of a chain of 30 women's clothing stores, I started my career as a clothing seller and gradually rose to a management position with 200 people subordinated to me.

When I became CEO, I worked 24/7: constant meetings, business trips, store openings. I had a huge responsibility.

But all this stopped bringing me pleasure.

Reason #2: The race for approval from others and tomorrow: tomorrow we'll take this supercar and put away these stinking sticks

My life turned into a race for the future. Everyone around me lived for tomorrow. Conversations were limited to what would happen next: “Tomorrow we'll take this car,” “Tomorrow we'll go there.”

I had heard that meditation helps to calm down. But every time I tried to “ground” myself through meditation and spiritual practices, the people around me reacted negatively. “Take away those stinking sticks, they smell disgusting!” they said. And when I turned on meditation, they responded: “Why do you need this crap? Better turn on something normal.” I felt depressed.

Instead of enjoying the moment, I was constantly making plans for the future. This rush and endless pursuit of tomorrow sucked me deeper into depression. The present remained somewhere on the sidelines.

So I stopped feeling joy in life.

Reason #3. Second divorce

2024, June, I went through my second divorce and my life felt like it was ending. Everything that used to be important lost its meaning. I felt like a “living corpse”, as if I had ceased to exist. I lay on the tiles for hours, and it seemed to me that there was no point in getting up.

She took sedative pills in increased doses and lay on the floor

My 20-year-old daughter went to her father, I was left home alone and didn't eat anything for four days. My friends called for scooter couriers so that I could at least stand up, open the door and get water and food, but even that seemed beyond my strength.

When I called my doctor and said, “That's it, I can't take it anymore, I'm dying.” She prescribed me some sedatives, but I was already taking four times the recommended dose. When I told her about it, she said, “Are you crazy?” But I can't get over it…

What helped me find my true self and get out of depression

One evening, lying on the kitchen floor, at 9 p.m., I called my doctor again, told him I couldn’t do this anymore, that I was dying psychologically. And then she said, “If you don’t get up now, I’m going to call the psychiatric hospital and they’ll take you away.” At that moment, I was in real shock.

I am a CEO, a strong woman, and suddenly I am taken to a mental hospital. This was a turning point for me. I decided: “Stop. I need to pull myself together.” And I got up.

Almost immediately after I started to rise somehow, I came across an advertisement for a retreat: “Arctic. Whales. Reboot.” It was organized by a man named Yuri.

I had never been to the North, but I always dreamed of seeing whales, and deep in my subconscious I wanted to go on a retreat*. But this desire was suppressed in me. The environment considered such practices to be shamanism, magic, and something forbidden, and something from which you should keep your money away.

A retreat (from English “retreat” — “solitude”, “removal from society”) is time spent in spiritual practices, removal from society, solitude and self-reflection. A way to quickly and effectively restore strength, reboot and know yourself.

Source: www.Forbes.ru

We immediately called Yuri, the retreat organizer. He showed me hundreds of reviews, told me about his path from IT, the trip program, and that this is not shamanism or esotericism.

At the end of the conversation, Yuri sent me an 8-minute meditation and breathing practiceThis short ritual became my salvation – I did it every day, and it literally pulled me out of that most difficult period.

In June my life was at the peak of stress, I was constantly taking pills in increased doses. In July, I quit antidepressants and sedatives with the help of one practice. Then I thought: what will happen if I go through the entire retreat?

The 4-day retreat began on August 1st in Murmansk and consisted of two parts:

Jeep tour of the most beautiful places of the Kola Peninsula. We visited the shores of the White and Barents Seas, enjoyed sea walks and seafood. And most importantly, we watched whales and seals in their natural habitat. We explored nature on ATVs, SUPs and kayaks, and conquered mountains.

Every day was filled with new impressions. We meditated, worked with breathing against the backdrop of the magnificent northern nature. I wrote dozens of pages of insights, conquered mountains, walked to the sounds of waves, and stood on nails with a view of the ocean and surfacing whales.

A short video of the Arctic Retreat

I was here and now, without thoughts about tomorrow, without a constant race for the future. I was just in the moment, enjoying every moment.

All my life I have always been indebted to my parents, child, husband, and environment. This burden weighed on me. During the retreat practices, I cried every day, dissolving resentments, anger, and pain through tears. Every day I released the burden that limited me. These tears became a liberation for me.

Therefore, the most valuable thing I got from the retreat was finding myself. For the first time in my life, I understand what I want next.

These four days were like four months. For the first time in a long time, I was able to truly stop and feel the life around me. There wasn't a single second that I didn't enjoy the moment, even when I cried.

Results after the retreat:

• People come up to me and say, “Can I just talk to you? You have such a sunny warmth that I want to talk. It's like you're charging me with positivity.”

• I used to be considered an arrogant bitch, but now even colleagues who always avoided me try to communicate with me. At the opening of a store in the center of St. Petersburg, they came up to me and said: “You look so cool, I didn't even realize it was you, you're just awesome.”

• A famous blogger at the opening, with whom we always discussed only work matters, suddenly invited me to a meeting in the evening, and then to her place in Moscow. And this is a person who does not let anyone into her circle.

• The man I met sent me a message in the evening: “After talking to you, I wanted to live.” And I was just talking to him.

If earlier on Saturdays I just went to my friends' dacha, now my weekends are much more eventful. I go horse riding, ride ATVs, go to the pool and meditate. I found more like-minded people, made new useful contacts, including networking. I go to the sauna and jump with a parachute =)

I now have the strength to lead an active and happy life.

Hello! My name is Yuri.

I am a retreat organizer, psychologist, breathing and meditation instructor.

My clients are entrepreneurs, freelancers, managers, many of them are skeptical about spiritual practices. And that's okay. Often, retreats are associated with practices based on various substances or shamanic rituals, but I do not support such methods.

During my classes, I give what is scientifically proven. For example, for those who were suspicious of breathing practices, I wrote an article “The Most Scientific Breathing Guide,” which combined the world’s research I had collected on the benefits of breathing for physical and mental health.

Lena has already shared how an eight-minute meditation and breathing practice literally saved her. If you are interested in trying it out for yourself, write “INHAL” comments under the article, and I will send you the very practice that helped Lena return to life without pills and stress.

I would be grateful for subscribing to my TG channel BODYENERGYwhere you will learn more ways to restore and support your mental health.

If you would like to attend the next retreat or come to me for a consultation, write to me at personal messagesI will be glad to help you on your path to harmony and inner growth.