6 Influence Principles That Will Change Your Career

Why do you think you bought that new gadget that you didn’t even think about yesterday? Or why do you agree to help someone even though you have absolutely no time? This is not an accident – this is the work of proven influence mechanisms. And Robert Cialdini’s book “The Psychology of Influence” explains in detail how this all works.

I have been working as a Python developer for many years and often come across the fact that in books that promise to improve your soft skills, they seem “empty” or overloaded with infomarketing. But unexpectedly, Robert Cialdini's bookPsychology of influence» – this is an exception to the rule. It doesn’t just feature pretty stories or motivational quotes, but describes proven principles that can really help in our field: from salary negotiations to improving teamwork.

The best part is that all recommendations are based on scientific research and many years of practice. This is not just a collection of motivational phrases, but a distillation of proven strategies backed by experiments.

Robert Cialdini is not just a theorist – he is a social psychologist who has conducted years of research, using both laboratory experiments (mostly on his students) and participant observationto explore the principles of influence from within. Essentially, he personally became part of various social and professional groups, changed his appearance and hid his true intentions in order to see how the masters of persuasion used their techniques.

He took jobs as a salesman for companies that offered encyclopedias, vacuum cleaners, or services, and received sales training like regular trainees. He also penetrated advertising and PR agencies and charities, studying their methods of persuasion and interaction with clients. Such experiences allowed him to accumulate a wealth of information, which he compiled in his book, focusing on methods for getting people to say yes.

Cialdini admits that initially his book was intended for the widest readership, therefore it was written in a non-academic style, but at the same time he was afraid that the book would be classified as “popular” psychology. However, contrary to fears, it was not at all perceived by his colleagues in academic circles as “pop”, but on the contrary, therefore, in subsequent versions, he retained its “conversational” style. However, all the conclusions in the book are based on scientific data and research (if you consider social psychology a “science”, of course).

Cialdini's principles of influence: It's not magic, it's science

Cialdini highlights six principles (and then adds seventh), which work everywhere: from negotiations in business to how you persuade friends to eat pizza instead of sushi. Here they are:

1. The principle of mutual exchange

Essence: You for me, I for you.

If someone gives you something (even if you didn't ask for it), you feel an obligation to reciprocate. Sellers use this principle all the time by giving “free” samples of products or discounts. In IT it works like a “free trial” – you try a service for free, and then it’s somehow inconvenient for you not to pay for it.

• The essence: People feel the need to repay debts in any form, which helps to form long-lasting relationships and transactions.

• Efficiency: Effective requests can include preliminary concessions or small favors before making the main request.

• Efficiency: Commitments work best when they are active, public and voluntary.

• Protection: One must be aware of when concessions are manipulative and aware of the impact of commitments on personal decisions.

How does this work:

• During interviews: After the interview, thank the interviewer for their time and send a thank you note. This will give him the feeling that he owes you something.

• In salary negotiations: Offer to contribute to an important project before you start talking about a promotion. This will create a positive attitude and a desire to reciprocate.

• In daily work and communication with colleagues: Help others with small tasks when you have free time. In the future, they will be ready to support you back when you need it.

A service must be paid for with a service: it cannot be neglected and, of course, it cannot be answered with an attack. A small favor, generating a sense of obligation, sometimes forces one to provide a much more serious service in return.

— Robert Cialdini

There is a duty to give, a duty to receive and a duty to repay.”

— Marcel Moss

2. The principle of social proof

Essence: If others do it, then I should too.

We tend to follow the majority and also trust the opinions of those around us. Feedback and recommendations from colleagues or influencers greatly influence us. This principle works great in the era of reviews on platforms like Amazon or Booking. If someone says that this is the “best development platform”, then even without deep analysis you will start to trust it.

• The essence: People rely on the opinions and actions of others to make decisions, especially in uncertain situations.

• Terms: Influence increases with uncertainty, a lot of “confirmation” and similarity with others.

• Factors: Shared identity, shared actions and experiences create a sense of unity.

• Application: You can use the experience of shared action to strengthen your connection with others.

• Protection: Decisions should not be based solely on the actions of other people.

How does this work:

• During interviews: If the company has high ratings on sites like Glassdoor or good reviews from former employees, you can mention this in the conversation, emphasizing that you would join such a team.

• In salary negotiations: Mention how other developers with similar experience earn higher salaries, citing market data.

• In daily work and communication with colleagues: Show that your ideas are supported by other team members or that the solutions you propose have already been successfully used in other projects.

When it comes to the principle of social proof, there are three main aspects that require special attention:

• uncertainty (we are not sure what is the best thing to do),

• mass (evidence of what is best to do comes from many other people),

• similarity (evidence comes from people just like us.”

“If we feel that in a particular situation the social proof autopilot is operating based on inaccurate information, we will turn off the mechanism and take control into our own hands.

3. The principle of authority

Essence: If the expert said it, then it is so.

The point is largely similar to the previous one. People trust the opinions of experts. In IT, these could be leading developers, authors of popular blogs, YouTube gurus and opinion leaders at conferences. Therefore, if a famous developer says that “this tool is top”, you will most likely try it without hesitation.

• The essence: Authority figures influence people's behavior, often causing them to act contrary to their own preferences.

• Elements: Titles, clothing, and other symbols of power enhance the influence of authority figures.

• Protection: It is important to evaluate whether a person is truly an expert and how reliable his information is.

How does this work:

• During interviews: Highlight your experience working with reputable companies or participating in well-known projects. This will make you feel like you are an expert.

• In salary negotiations: Refer to recognized experts or market research to justify why your offer is fair.

• In daily work and communication with colleagues: Quote well-known developers or rely on industry best practices to convince colleagues of your proposals.

People tend to automatically react not only to the essence of authorities, but also to simple symbols of their power: titles, clothing and attributes.

The first question to ask to determine if an authority figure is trying to influence us is: “Is this authority figure truly an expert in the field?”

But if we do meet with an authority who is a competent expert, it would be worth asking the question: “How truthful is this expert?” right now?

4. The principle of consistency

Essence: Start small and the person will feel obligated to continue.

If you start small, you feel obligated to go further. When a person starts doing something, it becomes difficult for him to stop – he strives to remain consistent in his actions. This principle works great when you are attracted to some small project, and then imperceptibly drawn to something larger.

• The essence: People strive for consistency in their words and actions, which increases the likelihood of compliance with requests.

• Efficiency: Early commitments work best when they are proactive, public, and voluntary. Exploitation of guilt

• Protection: It is necessary to be aware of the impact of previous commitments on subsequent personal decisions.

How does this work:

• During interviews: Make sure you agree to small tasks or discussions early in the interview so you can negotiate more later.

• In salary negotiations: Start by discussing small improvements in working conditions before moving on to the issue of salary. This will create a positive attitude.

• In daily work and communication with colleagues: Ask your colleagues to start with small contributions to your project, and then involve them in larger tasks once they are already included in the process.

It's easy to see why the automatic desire for consistency is a reaction that is difficult to control. It allows us to avoid constant thinking.

The automatic desire for consistency, being a programmed unconscious reaction, can relieve us of anxious thoughts. Hiding behind its reliable walls, we become immune to the arguments of reason.

— Robert Cialdini

Every time you make a choice, you transform the central part of yourself—the part that chooses—into something a little different from what it was before.

— C.S. Lewis

5. The principle of sympathy

Essence: We trust those we like.

People are more willing to cooperate if they like you. Once someone has gained your trust or sympathy, everything is sold. This rule applies in both personal and work relationships. In negotiations, this is extremely important: to be able to find a common language, adapt to the interlocutor and evoke positive emotions.

• The essence: People tend to say yes to those they like.

• Factors: Physical attractiveness, similarity, praise, and positive interactions promote liking and agreement.

• Protection: Being aware of how sympathy influences decisions can help avoid unnecessary pressure.

How does this work:

• During interviews: Maintain a friendly and open tone, find common topics, this will help to win over the interviewer.

• In salary negotiations: Try to establish a good relationship with your superiors in advance. Regular communication and mutual understanding make negotiations more productive.

• In daily work and communication with colleagues: In IT teams, it is important not only to be a good professional, but also to be able to find a common language with colleagues. Respect their opinions and maintain an open dialogue.

We like people who are similar to us. Moreover, it does not matter what this similarity lies in – in views, personal qualities, origin or lifestyle.

The time to become defensive comes when we begin to feel that we like someone more than is possible under the circumstances.

Benevolence is a friendly thief.

6. The principle of scarcity

Essence: The less available, the more you want.

When something becomes scarce or limited, people begin to value it more and want to get it faster. The more inaccessible a product is, the stronger the desire to purchase it. In the IT sector, this works both with a “limited supply” of software and with access to rare services or subscriptions.

• The essence: The less accessible a resource is, the greater its value in people's eyes.

• Motivation: The fear of losing something can be stronger than the desire to gain something new.

• Protection: It is important to control emotional reactions to deficits and be mindful when making decisions.

How does this work:

• During interviews: Mention that your skills and expertise are rare in the market. This will make you feel like the company is missing out on an opportunity if you are not hired.

• In salary negotiations: Show that your experience is rare and unique to the company, and without a promotion you can consider other offers.

• In daily work and communication with colleagues: The ability to demonstrate in a timely manner that resources or time are limited helps to achieve faster decision-making within the team.

Shortage: the less the better, but a complete loss is the worst that can happen.

The threat of losing something is more motivating than the opportunity to acquire something equally valuable.

The seventh principle of manipulation: The principle of honesty and validity

The seventh principle of manipulation: The principle of honesty and validity

The seventh principle of manipulation: instant influence

Essence: Primitive consent in the age of automation.

In the new edition of the book, Cialdini introduces the seventh principle of manipulation: instant influence. It differs from other principles and looks more like a concern or an attempt by the author to warn us about new risks in the digital age, when the pace is accelerating and many things are becoming easier with the use of digital services and gadgets. Let me explain this principle by quoting the author:

Modern life is different from life in any other, earlier period of time. Thanks to technological advances, information is exploding, alternatives are proliferating, and knowledge is advancing rapidly. Due to the growing tendency towards cognitive overload, the frequency of fast decision making is increasing.

The real fraud that we should not tolerate is any attempt to take advantage of a situation in ways that threaten the safe use of our favorite simplistic behavior patterns.

The only targets for our counterattack should be those who falsify, forge, or provide false information that “triggers” such a scheme in us.

When confronted with the principles of influence, we must always encourage those who seek to help us and condemn those who use them to harm us.

Influence as a process: A step-by-step strategy

Influence is not just a sudden “bang!” and you're done. Cialdini says this step by step processand for maximum success, each phase must be taken into account.

1. Cultivate positive relationships

Before persuading someone to do something, it is important establish good relationships. You cannot convince someone if they have a negative attitude towards you. This is the base.

How it works in IT: Let's say you're going to propose a new framework to your manager. First, make sure you have a good working relationship. Compliments, common interests, attentiveness will help you gain favor.

What helps:

• Principle of sympathy

• The principle of consistency

• The principle of mutual exchange

2. Reducing uncertainty

Even if a person likes you, this does not mean that he will unconditionally support your idea. Second stage – convince him that this is a wise decision. People tend to fear the unknown, so the best thing you can do is dispel those doubts.

How it works: you show real examples of how your idea will bring benefits. For example, if you are offering new software, provide reviews from other developers or statistics on its success in other projects.

What helps:

3. Motivation to action

Now that your idea seems reasonable, you need to push it into action. Even if you have convinced someone that your proposal is reasonable, they may still lack incentive. Add a little urgency and personal responsibility.

How it works: Remind your colleague of a time he has supported similar ideas (consistency principle), or tell him that this is a unique opportunity that may quickly disappear (scarcity principle).

What helps:

Examples from the book: Answers to the main questions

How to win people's favor?

It's easy – be friendly, attentive and find common interests. It's easier for people to trust those they like, so don't ignore social skills, even in a technical environment. A simple “How are you?” or “Cool code!” can decide the outcome of the entire conversation.

Simplify by betting on short-term odds

In the IT world, where it is important to move ideas forward quickly, it is useful to focus on short-term benefits. To gain support, it's worth showing your colleagues how the proposal can be useful now, and not in a few months. This could be a simple code optimization or a quick increase in system performance. When a team sees immediate benefits, they will be more inclined to support the idea because the short-term benefits seem more achievable and realistic.

Speculators

Like market speculators, some developers or managers may use understatement or exaggeration of facts to promote their decisions. For example, they may highlight only the best aspects of an idea, while remaining silent about potential risks. In IT, it is important to be able to recognize such speculation and ask the right questions in order to get the full picture, and not be led by manipulation.

Hit and Run (Small Triggers That Make Us Say Yes)

Small, seemingly insignificant triggers often drive our decisions. In IT, when someone offers to help with small things—like setting up a system or consulting on a project—it can make you want to say yes to bigger requests in the future. These triggers are automatic and our reactions may seem unconscious. It is important to recognize such moments so as not to fall into the trap of automatic consent.

The benefits of rapid response are efficiency and cost-effectiveness. It saves time, energy and mental capacity. But it also has disadvantages – obviousness and vulnerability.

When a person responds to only part of the available information, the likelihood of error increases, especially in automatic, unconscious responses, which increases even more if other people try to benefit by using trigger functions to stimulate the desired behavior at the wrong time.

How to ask for help correctly?

Just throwing out “help me” often won’t work. It is important to be specific and explain to the person how their help can be valuable. The principle of reciprocity also works here – do something small for a person, and he will be more inclined to help.

How to avoid becoming a victim of “equal exchange”?

You've probably encountered a situation where, after being offered something for free, a feeling of obligation arises. This is the “equivalent exchange” rule that marketers often use. Main – realize this trap and be able to say “no”, understanding that a gift is just a tool of manipulation.

Jujutsu

The Jiu-Jitsu principle of persuasion works by using the opponent's strength against him. In IT, this can manifest itself in situations where, when faced with resistance to introducing new solutions, you adapt your tactics to the logic of your opponents. If the team is afraid of change, try offering them a partial implementation with minimal risks. By exploiting their fear of change, you can reassure them that the process is safe and gradual.

Chinese tactics

An IT specialist in his work may encounter “Chinese tactics” when from time to time he is asked to take on new tasks. This can range from harmless participation in meetings to new roles or temporary switching to other projects. At first he may agree to small requests, thinking that they are just temporary concessions, but over time these small obligations add up, turning him into a “volunteer” for unnecessary work.

How to avoid becoming a victim of “Chinese tactics”? To protect against manipulation, it is important to set clear boundaries and learn to say “no” to even minor requests, as well as regularly review your commitments to assess how they align with your goals and priorities.

Every time you make a choice, you transform the central part of yourself—the part that chooses—into something a little different from what it was before.

— C.S. Lewis

Conclusion

“The Psychology of Influence” by Cialdini is a must-have for those who want improve your persuasion skills And learn to recognize manipulation. The principles he talks about are universal and applicable both in business and in everyday life. In IT, where you constantly need to promote new ideas, sell your projects or negotiate with your team, this knowledge is especially important.

The secret is to apply the right approaches at each stage of influence – from creating positive relationships to triggering action. Of course, this article does not cover all the topics of “The Psychology of Influence”, so the book is still recommended for reading. However, I hope that I was able to interest you, and also that this article will be useful in everyday life and work for many people in the IT field.

One last piece of advice before you start: Set a goal and write it down. Whatever it is, it is important that you set it and know exactly what to aim for. There is something magical about putting something down in writing, so set a goal and write it down. When you achieve one goal, set another and write it down too. Now to the start and forward.

— Robert Cialdini

Phenomenal book! Whether you're looking to increase your sales, close a better deal, or improve your relationships, How to Be Persuasive and Succeed offers scientifically proven principles to help change your life.

— Daniel L. ShapiroPh.D.